Gray

I remember becoming close friends with someone through this blog. And I remember falling in love and writing every bit of love story days in this blog --- that's why I even called it Color Me Rainbow. But that's over now.

I've lost my so called "bestfriend". Honestly, I don't know why. I already made up with her, with a sincere sorry. She tells me I'm insecure which was funneeh, I wasn't. She deleted me in all social networks again. I'm not insecure, I just don't like her "boastful-ness" but I got over that a long time ago --- and expected it was gone when we were friends again for the nth time. But I was keeping my mouth shout and considering facts. But don't you think that saying your RICH SCHOOL GIVES YOU $100 a month and you don't need to know about Be A Magpie is wrong? When I was talking about Magpie that day.. but hey, I don't know with her. She doesn't know what she's talking about, she keeps boasting about how many reviews for the day she has --- as if she wants to show it off to someone. LOL her. But I'm not mad at her, in fact she became funny to me acting like that. So, answer to her : NO I'M NOT INSECURE.

But again, goodbye old friend. I guess you changed so bad I can't remember who you really were. Maybe you changed already, you're too high to reach based on your too high attitude.

.....and about the love?

Well, I don't know if tomorrow there will still be someone to color me rainbow. I don't know what's the big deal of using the computer when you're using it for something useful. I could've been a bad girl friend if I want to. I could facebook all day or flirt through chat rooms but that's what he doesn't see. All I ask is that he stays late with me at night but I never get that. Despite all the sufferings I get because he's "moneyless", I never ever told anything about that. In fact, it was I looking for ways to help him. And tonight, I shutted my laptop down so I can sleep with him at the same time. He won't believe that I did it for him, but keeps on saying I'm all over my laptop and I'm mad at him because of it. I am..

lonely. But it doesn't matter where I get, I haven't found myself lately.

I don't even have a real friend I can run to when I'm in tears anymore!
I gave them up for my very understanding boyfriend...

So, tonight I cry and I'm sure if the first girl mention reads this she'll be happy.

As for the guy, he'll never know, because he never will try to anyway.

I miss God, at these moments, He's the only one who listens..

I pity myself I've been not talking to Him lately and wasting time with Ms-Know-It all someone and Mr-Understanding someone. I need some real love :(

See this link.. :(